When people despair, commit suicide, do drugs, I always think, I wish they could do the other one of drugs, that of the likes of homeopathy. I wish there was a way awareness could be raised about how the Bach flower essences and other alternative medicines alter your innate psyche, it helps you tackle yourself. There was this news of a very young actress commiting suicide due to a deep disturbance of relationships in her life. Apparently. Actually there is more to it than one singular reason. That what is the last straw becomes the ultimate trigger, and is labelled as the reason. The reality is far deeper. The person is trying their best at multiple levels. When they begin either feeling or experiencing failure one after the another at all ends, or the struggle gets overwhelming, people try to find an escape. The last main cause of upset just becomes the exact excuse to escape away, a retreat for the mind is sought by the mind in the form of depression. That could even begin with aggression, so to say, the person first feeling agitated about their state of affairs, but later, tiring out and resigning to it.
Things not to say to someone mentally fatigued are many, but most importantly, the worst is calling them ‘cowards, gutless, incapable, happens, ignore, forget, why don’t you fight it?, you don’t try enough, you don’t want to get out of it, you have victim mentality, you know you are mentally ill’, etc. A brain fag has ensued for them and it is a kind of fatigue that takes over once one has tried too hard everywhere. Even if this has been labelled an illness, the label in itself is detrimental to people accepting it. Straight plain depression appears more acceptable. Also, these people are different from attention seekers as well as those narcissists who act like victims. The latter are basically cruel people, with only time for themselves. They will make you pay in other ways if they find time to hear you at all. The former ones are only more vulnerable people. Somewhere the line between the two blurs too, and that is why the former are banged with remarks the latter deserve to earn.
We must develop our ear to hear the anguish of the ones really needing our attention that one odd time they need us as compared to the times they may have given us. Look around. Maybe there is someone with eyes eager for tears to roll and a mouth hungry to blurt their anguish. You need to recognize the one who appears like something else, or the one who is too silent. Verbosity and silence, both are masks to genuine pain. They have been biting their lip while you have been sharpening your axe of rudeness with, “ugh Come on! Happens, its life. You are too sentimental. Shrug off. Why crib so much? You know, you don’t try enough. You are the perpetual victim because you think like that in your head. Maybe you don’t put as much your heart in your work as much as you put your foot in your mouth?” to hack them off your back.
It is better to hear them out. If you can help with empathetic words, fine, else, silent listening is good enough. If you can suggest remedies, worth the effort, though, it is difficult to make people develop faith in something other than quack or fake. But I try. I like to try suggesting homeo or Bach options, music and meditation recommendations, and some chanting to the fractured hearts. All in all, you know, even if you consider all this exercise only equivalent to a placebo, in effectuality, it is slipping time of hope in their hands which have been till then full of despair. Bitter blunt truths maybe good, but sometimes lullabies and fairytales are read just to please ourselves with the thought that demons can after all be slayed and there can be happy endings. So rather than let people commit suicide for feeling incapable due to inability to handle harsh reality or opt for weed as an escape, it is much better to help them try Homeopathy and Bach flower essences to help them deal their issues with a reasonable mind.
I am a workaholic and I don’t ever know where to put a stop. To add to that, I am a multi-tasker who prides in being a perfectionist and intend to give equal and dedicated attention to each task in hand, at hand. I might just get killed with over-exhaustion but I will go on working endlessly, even when it gets far beyond my physical endurance. Any other idea in between the ideas floating in my mind, at the time of creation, can crash my world. Why? Because I am too deeply engrossed and completely involved in my work, for that point, whatever it is, it becomes my passion. Getting out of that reverie, that mind phase becomes difficult for me, I just feel the need to go on even beyond breaking point, till the point of completion. Bach essences help me manage this. Even today, I was so driven with a decor project that I went overboard in draining myself. Bach helped me settle my mind and regain enough strength that I could at least tell myself no more! and lie down on the bed. It broke the control of that hypnotic thought of the project and made me consider myself instead. If this is how, in small measures, we can draw our own breaks and escalators where required, then the world will become a much much better place, with less of its arrogant sadness, fuelled with rage.
My 2 cents.